Her Hero in Hiding Page 14
No doubt, no question. He’d carried her to the point of no return.
“Then hang on just a second.” He rolled away, and she heard what sounded like a drawer, then something tore. A familiar scent assailed her nostrils, and for an instant, just an instant, she remembered another time. Another first time when simple precautions had struck her as caring. She froze.
But then he came back to her, and before she could become totally locked in memory, he began again to caress her in those amazing ways, ways that took her so far out of herself that she was in a universe where Kevin had never existed.
“Clint, please,” she begged, her voice thick with need. “Please. Now.” She didn’t think she could bear another minute of this exquisite torture.
He surprised her. He didn’t push her onto her back. No, he lifted her so that she straddled him and had to brace her hands on his shoulders. He held her waist, stilling her.
“As much as you want, no more,” he said, his own voice husky with passion. “You’re in charge. You lead the way.”
She knew exactly where she was going now. She positioned him with her hand, feeling the latex, accepting that he cared enough to protect her, wishing he didn’t have to, and then she lowered herself.
Slowly. He was big. So very big, and her muscles stretched as if this was the very first time for her. That, too, made it special, seeming almost to cleanse the stains on her spirit.
Certainly it was her first time with Clint. And she reveled in it.
She took him slowly, but once he was fully within her, a sigh of sheer pleasure escaped her. Then, with his hands on her hips, it was she who took them both to the stars.
“I need to take care of something,” he murmured in her ear.
She lay hot, sweaty and utterly sated atop him. “No.” The last thing on earth she wanted was to be separated from him by even so much as an inch.
“Yes,” he said, and there seemed to be humor in his voice. “I don’t want to give you an unexpected present.”
She sighed, letting him reach between them to remove himself cautiously from her hot, wet depths, then allowed herself to be rolled gently to the side.
“I’ll be right back,” he said, and showered a few kisses on her face and breasts.
She didn’t want to move. Not one single muscle. She didn’t want to lose one bit of what she was feeling right now.
Eyes closed, she listened to Clint go into the bathroom, listened to the water run, and sensed the exact instant he returned to the room. How had she lived so long and never realized it could be like this?
He lifted her, surprising her eyes open, then put her back down, this time on a sheet. He pulled the covers over her, then slipped under them with her and drew her close. She snuggled into him, into the safe haven he had made for her.
And finally she said, “That was some rocket ride.”
A quiet laugh escaped him. “I’ve never had a better one. Ever.”
Moments she never wanted to end stretched before her in a golden glow. The transformation inside her seemed almost impossible to believe, yet there it was. She had changed. Forever.
The phone rang. This time it was Clint who groaned. “Hell,” he said.
She felt the same, but only for an instant. Kevin. It had to be about Kevin. With one ring of the phone he came slamming back into her world. Her heart skittered, and every muscle in her body coiled.
And this time Clint didn’t tell her to relax. Even in the dim light from the hallway, she saw the return of the stone mask.
He hurried out to get the phone, which was in the living room. She could only hear the sound of his voice, not the words. She lay stiff and waiting, afraid of what he might be learning. She squeezed her eyes shut and hoped it was just an old friend, nothing about Kevin.
But even so, Kevin had returned to her mind, with all the terror he had taught her. She couldn’t banish him. She might never be able to banish him. “Kay.”
She opened her eyes and saw Clint in the doorway. He was still naked.
“Get dressed,” he said. “I’m not going to turn on the light in here. Can you see well enough?”
“What’s going on?”
“Just get dressed. I got the mud off your shoes earlier while you dozed, so your feet will be protected.”
Terror rose in her as Clint grabbed his clothes from the floor and disappeared while she scrambled into the sweat suit. The socks he had loaned her lay on the floor, forgotten. They wouldn’t fit inside her jogging shoes anyway.
Her legs felt like lead as she went to the living room. There she saw something that made her freeze and gasp.
Clint was standing there, snapping his jeans, his back to her as he jammed his feet into his boots. But what she saw on his back gave a whole new meaning to “wounded.” Burn scars, deep dips in the flesh that suggested he had been shot and might even be missing parts of himself.
He heard her gasp, and he turned. More scars on his belly. Old ones. How had she not felt those scars with her hands?
He saw where she was looking. “Sorry,” he said roughly. “I know it’s not pretty.”
Her mouth felt dry, but she found her voice. “It’s the pain, not how it looks. God, you must have suffered.”
“Morphine is a wonderful thing.” But he was hurriedly reaching for his shirt, trying to hide the scars from view.
She wouldn’t let him. To hell with Kevin. She crossed the room fast, before he could button his shirt, and reached out with both hands, pressing them to his belly, then sliding them around to trace the scars on his back.
“Don’t hide from me,” she whispered, tightening her hold and pressing her face to his chest. “Please don’t.”
He stilled and let her hands trace the old scars. Then a sigh escaped him. “Kay, I need to recon. Now.”
She lifted her face and looked up at him. “You’re beautiful, you know. You really are.”
Something in his expression shifted, but only briefly. The stone returned hard and fast. “I’ve got things to do,” he said.
She didn’t know if he was trying to escape her, silence her, or simply reacting to the pressure, but regardless, she stepped back and let him finish dressing.
“Your shoes are in the den,” he said. “They should be dry by now.”
“Okay.”
“Keep the door locked. And grab that tire iron.”
“What happened?”
He paused halfway to the door and looked back. “Kevin was seen in town today. The sheriff has been showing his mug shot around, and apparently a merchant ID’d him.”
“Oh God! He’ll hear they’re looking for him.”
He shook his head. “Not in this county. People might talk among themselves, but they never gossip with strangers—any strangers—and especially not about something like this.”
He started toward the door again. “Lock up after me,” he reminded her. “And finish dressing.”
She did as she was told, trying to keep a handle on her fear. She wasn’t alone this time. She had Clint. And Clint would, by any measure, be more than Kevin could handle.
But that didn’t keep her from picking up the tire iron after she tied her shoes.
The wait seemed endless, but at last there was a knock at the door.
“It’s me,” said Clint.
She opened the door and let him in. She wanted to throw herself into his arms, let him hold her and drive away the terror once again, but something about him made her pause. She watched as he locked the door, then shed his coat and boots.
“Did you see anything?”
“Not yet.”
He walked past her, and she noted the shift in him. He was no longer the lover who had been so gentle. Now he moved like a large cat coiled to spring at any moment. It was almost a relief when he knelt before the fire and put another couple of logs on. That at least seemed normal and ordinary.
But the ghosts were back. She saw them the instant he straightened and faced her.
&n
bsp; “You can relax for now,” he said. But the gentleness was gone from his voice, and his eyes had a distant look to them. As if he were focused somewhere else.
“Maybe,” she said hesitantly, “you should call the cops to come get me. Or take me to them yourself.”
Now his gaze snapped into focus, and she knew for certain he saw her. “Why do you say that? You were dead set against it.”
“Because I’ll never forgive myself if something happens to you. Or if you have to do something you’ll regret later. I’ve been selfish. So selfish.”
“No.”
No? She stared back in astonishment. “No?”
He shook his head. “This ends soon, and it ends here. If I take you to the cops, there’s no telling when that bastard will find you again. No. This time it’s my way.”
Before she could begin to muster an argument, he started to move. Window by window he removed the obstacles he’d laid out.
“Why are you doing that?”
“I only put them there so you could sleep easily. So you wouldn’t be lying awake in terror that he might get in while you slept. They’re not necessary.”
“No? Then how the hell will you know if he breaks in?”
The smile he gave her was chilling. “I’ll know. I’ll know as soon as he makes the attempt. And the last thing I want to do is scare him off.”
She didn’t know if she liked this, but he seemed so certain.
“You only need a perimeter warning system when you don’t have enough sentries to cover the entire perimeter,” he said, as if trying to get her to understand. “You have a sentry. Me. Just trust me on this, Kay. The bastard is counting his freedom in days now, if not hours.”
She certainly hoped he was right about that. But Kevin had taken on such monstrous proportions in her mind that he seemed superhuman.
But then, Clint was taking on those proportions now, too, and for a much better reason. Finally she sagged onto the couch, still holding the tire iron, and let him do whatever he thought necessary.
Because Clint was right about one thing, if nothing else, this had to end. Over the last few days, Clint had taught her so much about the kind of life she wanted to have, a kind of life that was actually possible if she could get out from under Kevin’s shadow for good.
And she couldn’t think of a better reason than that to make the stand here and now.
Clint finished up at the back of the house. When he returned, though, he took his easy chair instead of sitting beside her, and she ached, feeling dismissed.
Yet some part of her realized that wasn’t fair. He had gone into some kind of mode that precluded distractions. He had the look of a hunter, she thought, and it wouldn’t be wise to break that concentration.
She ought to know. Intense focus had saved her more than once.
“Kay?” His quiet voice pierced a silence that had been punctuated only by the crackle of the fire for what seemed a long time now. “Yes?”
“I want you to know…” He hesitated.
She waited, sensing he was struggling with something. No point in pushing him.
He tried again. “The part of me you’ll see until we get Kevin…you don’t need to fear it.”
“I know that.” Her own certainty came as a surprise.
“Do you?” He searched her face. “But some of it may…horrify you.”
“After what I’ve been through? For the love of God, Clint, I’ve been beaten, burned, kicked, raped, strangled, kidnapped, starved and pursued across half the country. Maybe there haven’t been any guns or bullets yet, but I have a nodding acquaintance with what men are capable of.”
“I guess you do.” His face darkened.
“So let’s be clear on something I’ve finally figured out.”
“What’s that?”
“That sometimes, just sometimes, it matters why people do bad things. And self-defense, or the defense of another, seems like the best reason anyone could have.”
One corner of his mouth lifted. “Well, that’s Just War Theory in a nutshell.”
The remark came at her sideways, but then she caught his reference. “Really? I came up with something that smart on my own?”
He shook his head and sighed. “When are you ever going to believe you’re not stupid? You don’t need a wall full of degrees to be smart, Kay. Believe me. You’re smart.”
“I’d still like the degree.”
“When this is over, we’ll make that dream come true. God knows, you have everything it takes to get the piece of paper.”
That lit a little warm glow in her heart. But there was a bridge to be crossed first. A scary bridge.
“So,” she said hesitantly, “what’s the plan? What do we do?”
“We wait.” His gaze grew distant again. “I don’t think he’ll come tonight. It’s too soon after the blizzard. He couldn’t have scouted enough to be sure how many people are in the house.”
“Tomorrow night?”
“Possibly. If I were him, I’d wait for the dark of the moon, but he doesn’t have my training. My guess, and it’s only a guess, is that he’ll want another day to make sure there are only two of us here.”
“And then?”
“And then he’ll come when he’s sure we’ll be asleep. I’m betting somewhere between two and four in the morning.”
“But we won’t be asleep.”
“No way.”
She nodded, compressing her lips. “That sounds right,” she said after a few moments of thought. “He used to come after me at night, when he hunted me down. Twice he caught me in bed asleep. The last time…well, I was out jogging. Some of those country roads can be pretty empty. I thought I’d be safe because I’d hear any cars coming.”
“But you weren’t?”
She shook her head. “Obviously. He was waiting for me, not following me. He jumped out from behind some bushes and hit me on the head before I realized what was happening.”
“Hell.” He met her eyes. “Let’s get something clear right now.”
“What’s that?”
“You saw that my only closet doesn’t have doors. So when I tell you to hide, you get under the bed. No ifs, ands or buts.”
“Why?”
“Because there are two of us in this house, and he’s going to know it. Because he wants to end this. My guess is he’s going to come armed with something more than a tire iron or a knife.”
“Oh my God.” She breathed the words. “Clint, you’ve got to take me to the police. I don’t want you to risk your life!”
“No,” he said, stone-faced and impassive.
“Dammit, don’t give me that Sphinx crap! If he shoots you…” Oh, God, she couldn’t bear to even think about it.
“First of all,” he said levelly, “Kevin isn’t going to know I’m waiting for him. Secondly, I have body armor, a relic from the past. I just wish I had some for you. So you’re going to get under the bed, right?”
She nodded. “If there’s time.”
“There’s going to be time. That’s where you’re going to be before he gets into this house.”
“How can you know that?”
“Because I’m going to be awake and waiting.”
It sounded like a Möbius strip of thoughts to her, but he seemed so self-assured that she couldn t doubt him.
Helplessly, she looked at the pendulum clock ticking on the mantelpiece. It was the first time she had honestly cared what time it was, but now that clock had become all-important.
Because she knew he was right. Kevin would come in the dead of night. The only question was which night.
At midnight Clint went outside again. Ten minutes later he was back with an odd-looking pair of binoculars. “Night vision,” he said shortly when she looked curious.
Then he walked through the house, turning out the lights one after another, until the glow of the flickering fire was the only illumination. The shadows grew deep, moving as if with a life of their own.
He had
begun to pace in deadly earnest now, moving from room to room with surprising silence.
She watched him, growing increasingly on edge, wishing for distraction but knowing it would be dangerous now.
“Damn fire,” he muttered at one point.
“What’s wrong with it?”
“I can’t look out the front windows. If I pull the curtains back even a bit, he could see, because there would be light behind me.”
“Can we put it out?”
He shook his head. “No central heat. Besides, I might as well send up a flare, letting him know we’re on the lookout.”
He paused, obviously thinking. “Okay, I’m fairly certain he won’t come from the front. He might be seen. Sarah said they’re increasing road patrols in this area. Not heavily, but enough. He won’t be familiar with the usual patrol patterns, so it shouldn’t alert him.”
She nodded, trying to follow.
“No, he’ll want maximum cover. That means the back.”
“And you nailed the windows shut,” she reminded him.
He shrugged. “That was mostly for you. Breaking a window would announce his arrival, and sliding one open makes noise, especially with wood frames. And then it takes time to climb through, time when he’d be exposed. No, he’s going to try to jimmy a door lock. Maybe pick it.” He looked at her. “You think he knows how to pick a lock?”
“Probably. He got into my apartment twice without alerting the neighbors. Afterward, there was no sign of damage to the locks.”
“Good.” His smile was unpleasant. “He’ll be counting on that, then.”
He paced through the house once more, then glanced at the clock. It was almost one. “In a little while I’m going to ask you to move to the bedroom. If anything happens, anything at all, promise you’ll get under that bed.”
When she looked as if she might object, he went on.
“Look,” he said sternly, “I don’t want to have to worry about you. I want you safely out of the way so I can do my job.”
“Okay.” But she rebelled at him taking risks for her, though the more reasonable part of her knew she wasn’t capable of handling this on her own. Experience had taught her that. No matter how she had fought, Kevin had always gotten the upper hand, until finally she had learned not to fight at all. But one thing she was sure of, although she didn’t tell him, and that was that she would not simply hide. Not anymore. If she didn’t fight for herself, she would lose something essential and never be able to get it back.